Interchangeable Parts For Movies

I was watching Goonies this weekend and I was pretty pleased with the experience. Until, Sean Astin gets to where One Eyed Willie is and has a moment alone with him talking to him until he realizes that the rest of the gang has sneaked into the room behind him. He asks, “How long have you guys been standing there?”

Now, pretty much about anyone in the world can finish the screenwriting chores for the next line. Because this is an exchange seemingly as old as time itself. Just like we know “Who’s there?” comes after “Knock, Knock” we know that Brandon is going to say, “Long enough.”

I hate that! I don’t want to be able to predict what the next line is.

Here’s another moment that’s in about every single thriller known to man. There’s some tough guy, some bad ass action hero type. He might be James Bond or he might be Kyle Reese. He could be going out to battle velociraptors or he could be going to stop a speeding bus. But what’s going to happen in every single movie like this is he’s going to have a love interest. And at some point, he’s going to leave to go do something–to kick more ass. And at that moment, the girl he’s shacking up with is going to say, “Wait.” And he’ll stop. And she’ll say, “Be careful.”

As if that is going to change anything.

I HATE THAT!

Movies are too predictable. But every once in awhile, a movie does something different. But sometimes, it breaks your heart.

For instance, after watching D3 this past weekend—you know, Mighty Ducks 3. Our hero says to a girl, “Hey, I’ve got a game on Friday, maybe afterwards we could snag some Cokes.”

And you know, we the audience, want to see our hero snag some cokes. I mean, you know this movie is PG-13 but we all know what snagging some cokes means. But does he do that? No. He does that.

And we can’t help but leave feeling a little gypped.

I HATE THAT!