FOUR EYES
Glasses. I done got new glasses. A pic for this to come too. Also, if you happen to spy my For Eyes commercial please let me know! Or if you see it on the interwebs please forward. I really want to see it. If I haven’t told you about this before, it involves a dude trying on glasses and when he does, laser beams shoot out of his eyes and go around the store destroying things. The very last thing the laser hits is my butt. Which causes a small explosion and smoke. I had to wear a special pair of explosive pants for this(which had wires going up and down the whole thing which set off the little squibs(explosives).
This is a little scary as you’d imagine. Especially when the pyrotechnics guy says to you: “This is going to feel like a little warm(referring to my crotch). If it feels a lot warm, let me know.” I could make some sort of joke about my crotch always feeling a little warm because of my unit. But I won’t. I will just let you fill in the joke for yourself thus saving us both the trouble.
Anyway, there was also a nurse on set that made sure everything was alright with my pants and me after each take. We shot it a bunch of different ways as far as ouch that hurts fanning the flame shenanigans to indifferent New Yorker attitude to laser in pants encounter.
The best part is the contract which I have suitable for framing. The line for my part says, “Customer/Butt”.
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SILVER BELLS
It’s December 3rd and remarkably, I’m prolly 85-90% done with my Christmas shopping. Pretty exciting! I basically knocked out all of my nieces and nephews. Because I discovered something sad this year.
I am going to be the only sibling home for Christmas. Everyone else in the ol’ Shelk fam is done married. So they are spending Christmas with the other side of the family. It makes for some lonesome times. Because normally they’ll alternate with Thanksgiving. So you get a good Christmas or a good Thanksgiving but never both. Oh complexities of modern life!
But it’s much lonelier when it’s Christmas. And I thought, well if I’m buying all these gifties for these kids but they aren’t going to be here, what’s the point of bringing them home? I should just send them.
Which means, wow, the Christmas tree is going to be pretty bare this year.
I still need to get something for the girlie and some other people, but the bulk of it is done. So there’s that.
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BACK IN THE SADDLE
The Cowboys are 11-1. Pretty sweet! This means with a little bit of luck, they will prolly get home field advantage in the playoffs. Which is good news for a possible Super Bowl run. Of course, this still means they’d likely face the Patriots. But we’ll conquer that when we come to it. I’m just happy the Cowboys are finally relevant again. This might seem whinerish a bit like a Yankees fan complaining, but we Cowboys have gone through lean times before. We just have also had fantastic highs too(the 70’s, the early 90’s)but between those periods. It’s been a funk. I think that after the 90’s superbowls it was a bit like the fall of Rome. Everybody got so happy with themselves that the team because ridiculously self-confident and begain to fall apart. My big brother used to call that team the Crack Wagon.
But now, we’ve emerged with a young plucky Tony Romo to lead us to the promised land and watching Cowboys games are fun again.
Sidenote: How bad do you feel for Joe Gibbs? He makes the big blunder call in the emotional game after Sean Taylor’s murder. Yeesh. Poor Joe.
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BEDROOM OF A DIFFERENT COLOR
I’ve been on a home improvement kick lately. The first task has been the bedroom. It’s got all new furniture, plus a brand new paint job, and some other new stuff too. Next will be the main room. I’m gonna post a whole little photo tour of everything in a bit.
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TIME OFF
Going to Charlotte this week. So I’ll be sure to take lots of pics of Linus and Anderson. And when I go home from Christmas I think I should be able to get some of Dylan and Kayla. Just not on Christmas proper. Then I will take some of me and my parents being lonely at the siblings who’ve abandoned us. Sniff. Sniff.
But I’m excited for this month because I have a lot of vacation time that I have to use or lose it. So I have two four day weekends and then the whole 22-New Year’s off.
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